Tag Archives: love

Where are you Christmas?

21 Saturday Dec 2013

Posted by in Life, Love, My Thoughts

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“Where are you Christmas?  Why can’t I find you?” – Faith Hill

The real meaning of Christmas, the birth of Jesus, where did it go?  It has been replaced by ads for Toys R Us, Best Buy, Apple and more.  The true meaning has been lost among the marketing gurus of today.  Can we find it again?

Look into the eyes of a child, one not old enough to “want”.  Watch their eyes light up along with the colors of the season.  Watch them wonder what it’s all about.  Teach them that Christmas is not about Santa Claus coming down the chimney with a sack of toys.  The real story of Kris Kringle gets lost in all the commercialism of the times, and it’s up to us to guide the young in learning about the Christ child.  That we celebrate His birthday on December 25th.  It isn’t about physical gifts but about the gift of love, the gift of your heart.

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Kris Kringle is derived from Christkind, and is different than Santa Claus

A Christmas gift-bringer in Germany. The name “Kris Kringle” is a mispronounciation of the German name; the actual German figure is called “Christkind”, “Christkindchen” or “Christkindl” and is derived from the earlier Christkindl, which was introduced by Martin Luther. All of the German names mean “Christ child” and originally refer to the new-born Jesus.

The figure is distinct in origin and tradition from Santa Claus and Father Christmas. The Christkind (“Christ Child”) is the traditional Christmas giftbringer in Southern Germany, Switzerland, Austria, Südtirol and Liechtenstein. Since the 1990s, the Christkind is facing increasing competition in Germany from the Weihnachtsmann in the American version of Santa Claus.

The Christkind is a sprite-like child, usually depicted with blond hair and angelic wings. Martin Luther intended it to be a reference to the incarnation of Jesus as an infant.

The form “Kris Kringle” is only used in the US. In Germany, it is completely unknown.

Sources: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kris_Kringle

And yet we continue to promote Santa Claus as the reason behind Christmas. A man in a red suit does not stand for the true meaning of Christmas.  It is all about the birth of Jesus Christ.  We should be celebrating his life.  The electronics can wait another day.
“If there is love in your heart and your mind, you will feel like Christmas all the time…”

Original photo via jodysdevotionaljournal.blogspot.com

Copyright 2013

www.dorindaduclos.com

All Rights Reserved

Wedding Industry Gets Slammed Again

09 Monday Dec 2013

Posted by in Life, Love, My Thoughts, Wedding

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The wedding industry has once again been slammed.  A writer for the New York Times Magazine wrote a piece entitled The Wedding Fix Is In, claiming non-transparency & uneducated consumers as the industries downfall. I beg to differ.  As a past wedding and event professional for 15 years, I saw nothing but transparency with respected vendors who knew their product and how to sell it.  The article questions pricing, price gouging probably defines it better.  This is how it is.  If you hire a professional, someone who is willing to take the time to sit with you, go over what your visions are, and then bring these things to fruition, you’re going to pay.  If you’re looking to have a wedding for $30 a head, all inclusive, you might as well go to McDonald’s.

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A lot of the problems today stem from reality television, shows such as David Tutera‘s My Fair Wedding.  They aren’t realistic visions for today’s average bride & groom.  We’d all love to have that fantasy wedding, but the real reality is most can’t afford it.  So you’re back to where you started.  Shopping around for that best price.  But always be aware that there are scam artists out there.  Use references & referrals from friends and family members who have actually worked with the person before.

Hire a wedding planner.  Yes, do this.  She or he will guide you in the direction you need to go, within your budget.  More than likely, the planner works with a group of “preferred” vendors, and the savings can be passed on to you.  This is not to say that you must go with the planners vendors.  You may already have some of your own.  Again, she or he is there to guide you, to keep you within your budget.  They also see to it that everything falls into place for you, taking on the stress of the event so that you can enjoy your day.

Getting back to transparency.  Most wedding vendor sites have their pricing online.  The plus side to this is you can view and decide if this vendor fits into your budget without wasting your time or theirs, if the fit isn’t right.  All aspects of a wedding do not fall into this category of online pricing.  We’ll take photographers, as an example, because they seem to be targeted more frequently than most other event vendors.  Keep in mind that every brides expectation of her big day is not the same as the next bride who asks about photography packages.  The photographer can begin at your home, follow you to the church, etc, and then complete the day during the reception.  A timeline may look something like this:

Brides Home – 10:00AM includes family photos, getting ready

Church – 12:00 – 1:30PM includes ceremony and after pictures in the garden

Reception – 2:00PM – 6:00PM

Total time – 8 hours, without travel time, editing and printing/sending you your photos.  If you’re thinking you’re going to spend $500 on photography for an eight hour span, think again.  This is where the memories are captured.  You want a professional.  Not Uncle Harry with his camera phone.  Of course you may decide to only have the church & reception photographed, so the amount of time required, changes.  And so will the price.  Because of the differences in what each bride wants, one set price cannot be displayed.  You’ll find most wedding vendor websites, such as photography, will have a caption stating “Packages begin at”.  You have a starting point and you can decide whether or not this fits your budget.

It all comes down to this…a wedding isn’t just a party.  It’s a once in a lifetime (you hope) event.  If the pricing stabs you the wrong way, you might want to consider eloping, or having a small dinner party for your closest relatives & friends.  No one says you have to have 200 plus people attend.

It’s all about the love between two people.  Even if it means standing in front of the justice of the peace or your town mayor, with your two best friends beside you, then go for it.  You’ll be celebrating your lives, together.

original photo via arabiangazette.com

Copyright 2013

www.dorindaduclos.com

All Rights Reserved

Happy Thanksgiving

27 Wednesday Nov 2013

Posted by in Life, Love, My Thoughts

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No story today, just my thanks, to the people who matter most in my life…

I am thankful for my husband , a man who loves me and supports me in good times and in bad.  I am thankful for my children who remind me that laughter is living.  I am thankful for my Mom whose many sacrifices helped mold me along the way.  I am thankful to the rest of my family for making life fun.

I am thankful for a roof over my head and food on the table.

I am thankful for my friends, especially the ones who never let me down, who always have my back.  You know who you are.

I am thankful for the men and women who sacrifice their lives and family time to protect mine.

Most of all….I am thankful that God has given me another day to experience life to its fullest.

Have a Blessed Thanksgiving.

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www.dorindaduclos.com

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Why Did You Have Children? A letter to my son…

23 Wednesday Oct 2013

Posted by in Life, My Thoughts

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How many of us have been asked this question or one similar to it?  How many of us answered the way we thought others expected us to?  Recently, my 26 year old asked me that question.  I was actually caught off guard.   My answer was “because Dad & I wanted to”, to which he replied, “but why?”.  I didn’t answer him then but I will now.  Jonathan, this is for you…

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“When Dad and I married, we swore before God and our friends and family, to freely accept children into our lives.  And we did. We wanted to be able to give you the life we had, to grow up in a world filled with love, family & friends.  It hasn’t been easy, and while I realize you are going through a rough time right now, questioning the why’s of a lot of what the world has handed you, you have to realize that your life grows from here.   You have a lot to offer this world, your kindness, your wit and most of all your love. This is only the beginning of your journey.  You have an incredible personality, an artistic ability beyond compare and you rock as a big brother to Alyssa.  Now you need to see that for yourself.  When I speak about you, I smile.  Ok, sometimes it’s a sneer but it’s close enough.  That’s what children do.  They evoke emotions  in you that no one will ever understand unless they’ve actually experienced it.  The choice to have a child is ultimately yours and whomever you chose to spend the rest of your life with.  No one can ever really tell you “why”.  I can only hope that Dad & I have set a good example for you to follow.  We’re very proud to call you our son and we love you, bud.”

In today’s society, our children are a true reflection of who we are.  Take the time to nurture them, guide them, teach them and most importantly love them.  Remember, they’re the ones who pick your nursing home 😉

Me, Myself & I

20 Sunday Oct 2013

Posted by in Life, My Thoughts

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I was born in October of 1960, in Passaic, NJ.  I didn’t make it easy.  No way.  I was born breech.  Yep, I started out life by mooning the world.  Mom should have known at that point that I would be trouble.  I spent the first two plus years of my life in the East New York section of Brooklyn, NY.  Mom & Dad lived & worked in NJ and I was raised by my maternal grandmother, and my aunt Dee, who is really more like a sister to me.  We are only ten years apart.  I saw my parents on the weekends.  It was how it had to be.  They needed to work to give me a good home.  I didn’t understand that then but as I grew older I learned to appreciate all they sacrificed for me.

Eventually, we all moved to NJ,  Nana, Dee, & me, into the house Mom & Dad had just finished building.   I was very lucky to have three strong women in my life.   Let me tell you about them.

Nana.  Rose Marie.  A seamstress in New York’s garment district, I credit her for who I am today.  She was a no nonsense woman who told it like it was.  I didn’t get away with anything.  In fact, none of us did!  I tried to pull a fast one, on a day I didn’t want to go to school.  We walked to school, never had to worry that some stranger would take us, and so I walked.  And when I got there, I turned around and walked back home.  I knocked on the front door.  Nana opened the door and asked why I was there.  Now, being four years old, you’re not always smart enough to realize you need an excuse!  I blurted out the first thing I could think of…. “They didn’t have a hanger for my coat”.  I got the raised eye brow and the mmmhmmm and was turned around and told to go back to school.  She closed the door behind her.  Now you may think that sounds cruel, but it wasn’t.  She taught me a lesson.  One…don’t lie, you’ll get caught.  Two, take responsibility for your actions.  She was the most loving, warmhearted human being I’ve ever known and I miss her more & more with every passing day.

My Mom.  An amazing woman, who wanted nothing but the best for her family.  A hard worker, she began her career in a bank, because, she says,” I didn’t want to be the stereotypical secretary or teacher”.  Back then, those were the options for women.  After the bank, she worked for the same company for 42 years, retiring as their VP of Finance.  I am an only child.  I was not spoiled.  I was taught that if I wanted it, I had to earn it.  When I graduated high school, I was told college or get a job.  I chose the workforce, beginning my 20 year career as a pharmacy technician, eventually starting my own successful business.  In between, I went to school at night for computer science.  Mom wouldn’t hear of a student loan and so she fronted me, telling me I better finish what I started.  I graduated with honors, 2nd in my class.  Her gift to me…the loan was paid in full.  To say I admire this woman’s strength and perseverance would be an understatement.  She’s still a tough cookie but she’s softened over the years, especially were her grandchildren are concerned.

And last, but certainly not least, Aunt Dee.  We never called her that.  She was always Dee Dee, Dee, Denyse, simply because she really was so close in age to me and all of my cousins.  I have always considered her my sister.  She was, and is, there for me more times than I can count.  Always ready to lend a hand, help with a project, do my hair just right, oh yeah, and as she likes to remind me, swing me up on her shoulders and sing “here she comes, Miss America”.  Today, she is battling Multiple Sclerosis.  She is my inspiration as I battle MS’s cousin, Transverse Myelitis.  She’s the proof that you should never give up fighting.  Life hands you battles, you have to be the one to win…

These three women molded me into the confident person I am today.  The no nonsense individual who does not put up with any crap from anyone.  I stand my ground but I am also aware that, at times,  it may be necessary to say I was wrong, and I’m not afraid to do that. To simply say thank you to them is not nearly enough.

….and that is my story….for now.